Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way
Draco Malfoy
Hagrid
Harry Vampire Potter
Albus Dumbledore
Professor McGonagall
Lord Voldemort
Lupin
B'loody Mary Smith
Professor Snape
"Hey Ebony!"
"What's up Draco?"
"Yeah? So?"
"No I so fucking don't!"
"Guess what."
"Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Hogsmeade."
"Oh. My. Fucking. God!"
"Well.... do you want to go with me?"
"Hi Draco!"
Hi Ebony."
"Joel is so fucking hot."
"What's wrong?"
"Hey, it's ok I don't like him better than YOU!"
"Besides I don't even know Joel and he's going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch."
"What the fuck do you think you are doing?"
"What the fucking hell?"
"Oh! Oh! Oh!"
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"
"You ludacris fools!"
"They were having sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Forest!"
"Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?"
"How dare you?"
"BECAUSE I LOVE HER!"
"Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms."
"Are you okay, Ebony?"
"Yeah I guess."
"I'm so sorry."
"That's all right. What's your name?"
"My name's Harry Potter, although most people call me Vampire these days."
"Because I love the taste of human blood."
"Well, I am a vampire."
"Oh Draco, Draco!"
"You bastard!"
"No! No! But you don't understand!"
"No, you fucking idiot!"
"You probably have AIDs anyway!"
"VAMPIRE POTTER, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!"
"Ebony, it's not what you think!"
"What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!"
"Vampire, I can't believe you cheated on me with Draco!"
"But I'm not going out with Draco anymore!"
"Yeah fucking right! Fuck off, you bastard!"
"Thou must kill Vampire Potter!"
"No, Voldemort!"
"No! Please!"
"Thou must!"
"If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Draco!"
"How did you know?"
"I hath telekinesis."
"And if you doth not kill Vampire, then thou know what will happen to Draco!"
"Are you okay?"
"I'm sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me."
"That's okay."
"Ebony! Are you OK?"
"What the fuck do you think?"
"Well, Voldemort came and the fucking bastard told me to fucking kill Harry! But I don't want to kill him, because, he's really nice, even if he did go out with Draco. But if I don't kill Harry, then Voldemort, will fucking kill Draco!"
"Why didn't you fucking tell me!"
"How could you- you- you fucking poser muggle bitch!"
"What have you done!"
"Ebony Draco has been found in his room. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists."
"EW, YOU FUCKING PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NAKED! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!"
"Abra Kedavra!"
"Ebony, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"What do you know, Hargrid? You're just a little Hogwarts student!"
"I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT...."
"BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!"
"This cannot be." Snap said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from his hand where Dumblydore's wand had shot him.
"There must be other factors."
"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!"
"The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!"
"Because you're goffic?"
"Because I LOVE HER!"
"OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!"
"How did u know?"
"I saw it! And my scar turned back into the lightning bolt!"
"I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!"
"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation."
"Anyway my scar hurt and it turned back into the lightning bolt! Save me! then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco................Volfemort has him bondage!"
"Enoby I need to tell u somethnig."
"Fuck off."
"You know I fucking hate the color pink anyway, and I don't like fucked up preps like you."
"No Enoby."
"Those are not roses."
"What, are they goffs too you poser prep?"
"I saved your life!"
"No you didn't
"You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Snap and Loopin."
"These aren't roses."
Well If you wanted Honesty that's all you haD TO SAY!
"hat's not a spell that's an MCR song."
"I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes."
"Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for raven I love you girl!)imo noto okayo!"
"OK I believe you now wtf is Drako?"
"U c, Enobby,"
"2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?"
"I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!"
"U r a liar, prof dumbledoree!"
"You look kawai, girl."
"Fangs (geddit) you do too."
"Hi back."
"STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!"
"Vampire you fucker!"
"Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Draco!"
"OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!"
"I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!"
"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation."
"Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco................Volfemort has him bondage!"
"Dumbledore Dumblydore!"
"Dumbledore Dumblydore!"
"What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?"
"Volsemort has Draco!"
"Volsemort has Draco!"
"No! Don't! We need to save Draco!"
"No! Don't! We need to save Draco!"
"I don't give a darn what Voldemort does to Draco. Not after how much he misbehaved in school especially with YOU Ebony."
"Besides I never liked him that much anyway."
"My Draco!"
"Its okay!"
"I had an idea!"
"You'll see."
"Allah Kedavra"
"Ebony Ebony!"
"No, please, come back!"
"Whatever! Now u can go anh have sex with Vampire!"
"Enoby I love you!"
"I dnot care what those fucker preps and posers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide all the time. Now I just wanna fucking be with you. I fucking love you!."
"I love you!"
"Wtf Draco im not going to a concert wid u!"
"Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its MCR n u no how much I lik them"
"What cause we...you know..."
"Yeah cause we you know!"
"We won't do that again."
"This time, we're going with an ESCORT."
"OMFG wtf/ Are you giving into the mainstream?"
"So I guess ur a prep or a Christina or what now?"
R u becoming a prep or what?"
"Enoby! I'm not! Pls come with me!"
"OK then I guess I will have to."
"Hajimemashite gurl."
"It serves that fuking bich right."
"Maybe Willow will die too."
"Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I murdered her and den loopin did it with her cause he's a necphilak."
"OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with drako tonight in Hogsmeade with mcr."
" I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA."
"Omfg totally lets go shopping."
"In Hot Topic, right?"
"B'Loody Mary are u a PREP?"
"I found some cool goffic stores near Hogwarts that's all."
"Hu told u abut them"
"OMFFG DUMBLYDORE?"
"Yah I saw the map for Hogsmeade on his desk."
"Come on let's go."
"Da real goffs?"
"Da real goffs?"
"OMFG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!"
"Yeah it looks totlly hot."
"Yeah I am actually."
"Hey BTW my name's ebondy dark'ness dementia TARA way what's yours?"
"Yeah I don't think so cause I am going there with my bf drako you sick perv!"
"OMFG EBONDY U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE CASTLE NOW!"
"WTF Hargrid?"
"Fuck off you fjucking bastard."
"Yah but not as kawaii as you."
"U moronic idiots!"
"Enoby, I told u to kill Vampire. Thou have failed. And now...I shall kill thou and Draco!"
"No no please!"
"No no please!"
"I thought he was just wearing that to scare Volsemort!"
"Hello everyone."
"As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?"
"BTW you can call me Albert."
"What a fucking poser!"
"No one fucking understands me!1"
"Accuse me? What about me!"
"You fucking bastard!"
"No! Wait! It's not what it fucking looks like!"
"You gave me a fucking shock!"
"Wtf do you fink you're doing in da gurl's room?"
"Hey I need to ask you a question."
"What are u wearing to the concert?"
"U no who MCR r!"
"No I just saw there was a concert dat a lot of gothz and punx were going 2."
"Anyway Draco has a surprise for u."
"Wut de fucking hell r u doing!"
"R u gonna cum rape me or what."
"No, actshelly (geddit, hell) kan I plz burrow sum condemns."
"Yah, so u can fuk ur six-yr-old gurlfriend, huh?"
"Oh my god you ludacris idiot!"
"Oh my god you ludacris idiot!"
"WTF is that why u wanted condoms?"
"Only you wouldn't give them to me!"
"Well you shoulda told me."
"You dimwit!."
"Well xcuse me!"
"Well xcuse me!"
"What was dat al about?"
"What was dat al about?"
"It wuz to blackmail u."
"So now next time you see me doing it with my boyfriend you cant fuking rat me out or I'll show dis to Dumbledork. So fuck off, u bastards!"
"WTF where'd Draco?"
"Oh he's bein a fucking bastard. He told me he wouldn't cum."
"U wanna cum with me? 2 the concert?"
"Draco are u okay?"
"No I'm not u fuking bitch!"
"Its ok Enoby."
"Ill make him feel better."
"You mean you'll go fuck him wont you!"
"No fuck u you preppy little poser sun of a fukcing bich!"
"R u okay?"
"I guess though."
"Why the fuck are u all here?"
"Enoby something is really fucked up."
"OK but I need to put my fucking clothes on first."
"It's all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. Your so fucking beautiful."
"Oh all right."
"I will I will."
"Very well."
"Butt we cannot do this. We can't close the school. There is only one person who is capable of killing Voldemort and she is in the school. And her name is...Enony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way."
"Oops she made a mistake!"
"She means hi everybody cum in!"
"Vampire, Draco WTF?"
"You fucking bustard!"
"I want to shit next to her!1"
"No I do!"
No she doesn't fucking like u, you son of a bitch!"
"No fuck you motherfucker she laves me not you!"
"Plz don't make me kill him plz!"
"Kill him, or I shall kill him anyway!"
"Ebony Ebony aure you alright?"
"Yeah yeah."
"Everyfing's all right Enoby."
"No its not!"
"OMFG what if I'm getting possessed like in Da Ring 2!"
"Its ok gurl."
"Maybe u should ask Proffesor Sinister about what the visions mean though."
"Ok bich."
"Well I have to talk to you about some fings something . When do you want to due it?"
"OK I'm having lotz of visions."
I'm so worried is Draco gong 2 die.
"I said I see a black gothic skull and a pentagram."
"Bye bitch."
"Ebony what the fuck did Profesor Trevolry say."
"She said she would tell me what the visions meant torromow."
"OMFG Draco Draco!"
"No! Oh my fucking god!11"
"Ebony what's wrong?"
"Hi Vampire."
"Oh fuck it!"
"What fucking dick did that!"
"I don't know."
"Now come on we have 2 tell Dumbledor."
"Enoby had a vision in a dreem."
"Look motherfucker."
"Were are they?"
"Tara, I see drak times are near."
"What fucking happened?"
"What fucking happened?"
"Yeah what happened?"
"Are you okay?"
"Yah I guess."
"The problem is...I have to seduce Volxemort. Ill have 2 go bak in time"
"Itz okay Eboby."
"But what about me? Ur not gonna brake up with me or anyfing, are you?"
"Of coarse not!"
"I love you Eboby. Oh let me feel u I need 2 feel u."
"WHAT THE FUCK R U DOING!"
"WHAT THE FUCK R U DOING!"
"CUM "NOW!1!"
"Hey what the fuck!111"
"Yeah buster what the fuck are u going to do with the fucking camera?"
Hahahaha the Mystery of Mogic thinks he is crazy there is no way dey wil believe him.
"Yes so shut your mputh you inlosent fools!"
"It's ok Enoby."
"What the fuck r u doing!"
"U must stab Vrompire."
"If u don't then I'll rap Draco!1"
"No you fucking bastrad!1"
"Dumbeldork will get u!"
"Yah just wait ubtil da Mystery find out!11"
"You ridiculus dondderhed!111"
"You dunderhed!111 Im going to kill-"
"No I'm not I was teaching them somefing!1"
"Oh fucking yeah?"
"Whatz in da bag?"
"You look fucking kawaii, bitch."
"Im Enoby Way da new student."
"Hey Satan........do u happen to be a fan of Gren Day?" (sinz mcr and evinezenz dont exist yet den)
"omg me too!"
"so is dumblydor your princepill?"
"OMfG SHME TOO!"
"yah that's why im here im NEW."
"NO TALKING IN THE HALLS!"
"STUPID GOFFS!"
"actually I fink mebe its becos ur da barke lord."
"oh nuffin."
"OMFG NO
"dumblydore I think I just met u."
"oh yeah I rememba that."
"wth how?"
"hey r u crying tears of blood?"
"fuck off!"
"Oh my fuking god!1"
"Shud we get u 2 St Manga's, bitch?"
"Hey Sexxy."
"How'd it go Enoby?"
"How far did u go wif Satan?"
"Not 2 far, lol."
"Will you hav to do it with him?"
"I hop not 2 far!111"
"What happened 2 Snipe?"
"U will see."
"NOOOO PLZ!1111"
"Oh Draco!111111!1 Oh mi fuking gud Draco!1111"
"So what the fuck happened 2 Snipe and Loopin?"
"Where r Draco and Vampira?"
"Whose he!11"
"Draco what da fuk r u dong!111111"
"Oh hi Lucian!1"
Im Ebony the new student lol
"Hey bastards."
"But don't u have a lead singer!"
"Oh my fuking god!11 Datz so fuking sad!1"
Im in a bnad myself."
"Yeah were called Blody Gothik Rose 666. Do u wanna hr me sing?"
"I wok dis empt stret on da bolevrad of broken dremz."
"Enopby? Will u join da band? Plz!1"
"Are we gong to play tonight?"
"What da hell r u dong here!11"
"OMFG Sorius I saw u nd Samaro and Snip nd everyone!11111 I kant beleev Snap uzd 2 b goffik!111111"
Hi fuker."
"Lizzen, Satan asked me out to a gottik cornet and a movie so I need a sexah new outfit for da date. Also I"m playng in a gothic band so I need an ootfit for that too."
"Oh my satan!1"
"Want 2 go to Hot Topik to shop 4 ur outfit?"
"Yah we need sum portions for Profesor Trevolry so she wont be adikted 2 Volxemortserum anymore nd also..............sum luv potion 4 Enoby."
"Hey where the fuck is Dumblydore!111"
"Can you BELEVE Snap used to be gottik!1"
"WTF is he doing?"
"HARGRIF WUT DA FOK R U DOING!11"
"God u r such a posr!1"
"Oh mi fucking satan!11"
"Maybe I cud uze Amnesia potion 2 make Satan foll in love wif me faster!1"
"But u r so sexy and wonderful aneway Tata,"
"Why would u need it?"
"But you wont have to do it wif him or anyfing, will u?"
"OMG fangz!"
"OK Profesor Sinister isnt hr what the fuk should we do?"
"Oh my fuking satan!1"
"How could they do that!11"
"WHAT DA HELL R U DONG IN MY OFICE!1"
I don't kno wut da fuk r u DOING
"Oh sorry I wuz just looking around koz I thought it wuz class."
"Oh hi you guys."
"Wheres Satan?"
"Ok I will see you guyz at da concert."
"Lol, I totally decided not 2 comit suicide when I herd Hilena."
"...Hey Satan do u know da cure 4 when ppl r adikted 2 Volxemortseruem?"
"Fuk u!11"
"I'm a vampire."
"Yah siriusly."
"Wel if u wonted honesty datz all u had 2 say!1111"
"I'M NUT OKAY!1"
"U guys are such prepz!11"
"Cum on it wuz a mistake!1"
"U guys stop!11"
"I'm sorry. It's something I had to do, to fufill my duty as the noble gothic Mary Sue."
"I love you two. I'll...I'll see you in hell."
"THIS IS UNLOGICAL AND DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE!"
"Oh mi satan wut happened!"
"Get the fuk out u fucking bastard!11"
"Thou hath nut killd Vampire yet!11"
"Volxemort? OMFG what's wrong!111"
"OMFG Enoby ur alive!111"
"What the fuk happened?"
"Oh my satan!11 Am I lik dead now?"
"OMG I cant beleve Vampirz' dad shot u!1"
"Hey haz aneone fuking seen Draco?"
"We can go c Hose of Wax wif Draco!1"
"Letz go lizzen 2 GC and kut ourselvz 666!11"
"U fucking prep!11"
"U fucking prep!11"
"U fucking prep!11"
"Yah u betrayed us!111"
"No u don't understand!1"
"Enoby no!11111"
"Oh mi satan wut happened!"
"Get the fuk out u fucking bastard!11"
"Thou hath nut killd Vampire yet!11"
"Volxemort? OMFG what's wrong!111"
"OMFG Enoby ur alive!111"
"What the fuk happened?"
"Oh my satan!11 Am I lik dead now?"
"OMG I cant beleve Vampirz' dad shot u!1"
"Hey haz aneone fuking seen Draco?"
"We can go c Hose of Wax wif Draco!1"
"Letz go lizzen 2 GC and kut ourselvz 666!11"
"U fucking prep!11"
"U fucking prep!11"
"U fucking prep!11"
"Yah u betrayed us!111"
"No u don't understand!1"
"Enoby no!11111"
"OMFG! Im back in Tim again!111"
"OMFG Enoby r u ok."
"Yah Im okay 4 ur in4mation."
"OMG am I dedd?"
"No ur not dead."
"Ur a vampire so u kant die frum a bullet. Cum on now lets go c how Hairy's dad is doing."
"WTF! James almust shot Luciious!"
"Yah I know but he had a headache he wz under a lot of stress."
"I guess that's ok."
"Who da fuck is that?"
"Dis is...Hedwig!!!!!!!!!11"
"He used to be in XBlackXTearX 2 but he had 2 dropp out koz he broke his arm.
"Hey Hedwig."
"Dat was Hedwig. He used 2 b my boifreind but we broke up."
"OMFG I can get u bak 2gether!"
"Ok u can 4get about ur class for now, Hedwig. Im going 2 show u something grate!1"
"Cum on u guys."
"Yah go fuck urself Samaro!"
"B quiet u guys."
"OK Satan and Hedwig, u guys can start making out."
"What da hell is this anyway?"
"Be quiet you Satanists."
"If ur lucky I'll probably send u all to Akazaban! That will teach u to copolate in da Great Hall."
"You fucking poser."
"Yeah shut up!"
"I've had enough of u Satanists in my school!"
"Evry1! Jump in b4 itz 2 l8!
"You dunderheads!1111111111"
"Dis is da future. Dumbeldore's iPod dat he tried to take away from me wuz really also a tim machine."
"It's somefing u use 2 lizzen 2 music."
"Um I guezz sand?"
"Hey whose that, Ibony?"
"Oh its Satan."
"Are you okay Satan?"
"Are you okay Satan?"
"No I still like you."
"Oh my fucking god, where's Draco!111 How did Snap get back here! I tohot he wuz in Azerbaijan."
"That bitch!11 Did she also free Hargrid and Loopin?"
"OK. But where's Dracko? How cum he was doing it with Snap?"
"OMG dat's terrible!"
"Lizzen evry1, I have sumthing imptent to do. in hr evry1 stay Everyone stay in here !"
"Good luck Tara!11"
"You fucking bitch!111"
"No!1 Help me!1 Please!1"
"OMG Vampira!111"
"I wus so worried you died!"
"I know but Im a vampire lol.
"Where's Draco?"
"Draco? You mean that fukking poser who betroyed you?"
"I NO BUT WE HAV 2 FIND HIM."
"I'll do it den."
"Oh my fucking satan!"
"I fink Voldimort has arrivd."
"Fuck, I have to find Draco!1 I guess we shood separate."
"Draco are you okay?"
"I'm not okay."
"Oh Draco why did you do it with that fucking bastard Snape?"
"Im so glad we me and Snape Snape and I were freed."
"Pop addelum!111"
"You fukking perv."
"Now u have 2 tell us where Voldimort is or I'm gong 2 torture u!"
"I don't now where he is!1111"
"Oh my satan, we were so worried about u guys!1"
"Oh mi satan! Draco!"
"Oh Vampire! Vampire!"
"Dat's mi car!"
"I shall free you Loopin but first you must help me kill these idiotic donderheads."
"Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way must be killed. Den the Dork Lord shall never die!"
"You fucking prep!"
"I forgot to tell u, Ebony. Snape made me do it with him. I didn't really have sexx him but he's a ropeist!"
"I knew who thou were all along."
"Now I shall kill thee all!"
"No plz don't kill us!"
"What is da meaning of dis?"
"The Dark Lord shall kill all of you. Then you must submit to him!"
"Oh my fucking god!1"
"If you kill me then deze cideos will be shown to everyone in the skull. Then u can be just like that goffik girl Paris Hillton."
"FYI I hav da picter of u doing it with Loopin!11"
"Whats she talking abott?"
"I saw 2 she's gunna show evry1 da picter!111"
"Shut up!111'"
"Foolish ignoramuses!"
"Thou shall all dye soon."
"Think again you fucking muggle poser!1"
"Acco Nevel's wand!11"
"Now I shall kill thee all and Evony u will die!11111"
"Save us Ebony!"
"ABRA KEDABRA!11111"